This past Sunday, my Linus, my Old Man, my Hot Water Bottle, died. He leaves a little Linus-shaped hole in my life.

Several years ago, Linus was diagnosed with inflamed bowels (possibly cancerous – we never did surgery to check) and had been on prednisolone ever since. Most of the time he was happy and hungry and pooped a lot. But he’d have the occasional “bad belly day” as I would call them. Sometimes lasting a couple of days. But then he’d be back to his usual self.

At his last vet appointment, Linus had lost 2 pounds since his previous annual physical, so the vet gave him a blood test. Everything came back fine except his thyroid. It was overactive. Hence the weight loss. Linus was prescribed a new medication to take each morning and evening. (With 3 pills per day in his pill case, I would be no longer likely to mix up our pill cases when I take my Zyrtec in the morning… OK, so I only did it twice! Once when I was fighting the flu and the other time right after the time change, OK?)

Anyway, it seemed that the medication was helping. He had gained another 0.6lb from his appointment and seemed to be doing OK. But then Friday he was going back to his glum “bad belly day” mood. And Saturday he seemed even worse. Our vet isn’t available on the weekend, but I’d decided I’d call Monday to see if we should cut down the thyroid pill dose. He was due for the 1 month check in tomorrow (Wednesday).

Sunday morning, he seemed better and ate some breakfast. My sister was coming to Troy that day, so I spent the morning and early afternoon with the folks and her. We had a lovely day. Then Amy came to help me take some stuff out of the basement for an upcoming garage sale. Linus & Reesie were crashed out on the sofa. Once Amy left, I joined them for a bit. Reesie seemed as concerned as I was for Linus, who was feeling bonier than he’d ever felt.

Sunday was laundry day, and had been interrupted some by my family visit. So I got another load going and decided the three of us needed to cuddle in the comfy chair. We spent well over an hour together, first me and Linus, and soon the three of us. It was very fine cuddling indeed.

Sadly, I needed to get more laundry shifted, but my goal was to return to cuddling ASAP. But while I was downstairs swapping loads, Linus decided to hop out of the comfy chair and was laying down on the floor in front of it. I dumped the clean laundry on the bed and went in to the library check on him. He laid on his side, spasmed a cou ple of times, and then he was gone. Reesie left the room around that time too – I think she figured out what was going on. I found a shoe box for him (he needed a bigger one that Lucy) and then buried my grief in chores.

I’d texted the family about Linus and they were all lovely and supportive. But I decided I’d bury Linus on my own. (Amy had come over to help me with Lucy’s grave. And damn if I didn’t pick the rootiest place to dig! I picked a much less rooty place for Linus and was done a lot quicker than the pair of us had been. Sorry Amy!) And then I found even more chores to do.

Reesie and I finished up the evening on the sofa together streaming something – either the Eternals or Lovecraft Country – and I consoled myself with a pint of ice cream. Reesie was a wonderful comfort to me, so I thanked Corinne on Monday for bringing her into my life. (And to Linus’ life. I think he stayed around longer because of her.)

I had nearly 18 years with my good boy and most of that time with his sister, Lucy, too. I was very lucky to have found them (thanks Brandi!) and to have them in my life. Thank you for all the cuddles Linus! I’ll miss having you as my hot water bottle at night!