THE DOCTOR WHO RATINGS GUIDE: BY FANS, FOR FANS
Terrance Dicks

Writer and Script Editor.



Reviews

The Complete Terrance Dicks by Finn Clark 27/12/03

Around Christmas 2001 I read the complete Terrance Dicks as part of a read-a-thon and posted my conclusions to the internet. I then completely forgot about them. However following in the excellent footsteps of John Seavey's authorial retrospectives, I've dug out and updated my scribblings in case anyone might find 'em interesting.

Lance Parkin has pointed out that when we talk of Terrance Dicks's "recent work", we're usually talking about the past twenty years (i.e. The Five Doctors onwards). His reputation was gold-plated throughout the Virgin era thanks to his TV credits and Timewyrm: Exodus - and he'd have surely been rated even higher had he not asked Robert Holmes to take his name off Brain of Morbius. However The Eight Doctors sealed his fate. From then on it was impossible to take the man seriously. To be honest there's not much to choose between his later NAs and his BBC Books (The Eight Doctors and Warmonger excepted) but once fandom's goodwill bubble had burst there was no way back.

But respect to the man - he did write eighty-odd Target novelisations, which were the videos and DVDs of an entire generation of UK fandom. They were children's books, yes, but that doesn't mean they're not still entertaining today. I reread a couple (Planet of the Daleks and Planet of Giants) and Terrance's prose flies like the wind to create snappy, action-filled thrillers that at their best kick the arse of his original novels. In the following list, Planet of the Daleks (brilliant!) would come second after Timewyrm: Exodus while even Planet of Giants (a novelisation I selected as probably the least suited to Terrance's style, just to see him at his worst) is probably hovering somewhere around Deadly Reunion.

Moving on to the present day with Virgin and BBC Books, Terrance's heart is still with Target. He doesn't write full length novels, but instead a few vaguely connected Target-length stories and shoves them together with the minimum of stitching. The only Terrance book not to chop itself up like this is Catastrophea, which is instead SLOOOOOW.

A Terrance Dicks novel is also likely to revisit, namedrop or sequelise one or more of his favourite things. Vampires, Gallifrey, Winston Churchill, Casablanca, gangsters from 30s Chicago and World War Two are among his favourite tropes. [It's interesting to note that his first two Tom Baker TV stories have their roots in Frankenstein, which is a hobby-horse he seems to have let go in later years.] He also has an unfortunate fondness for rape references in his novels, which is usually merely disasteful but in Warmonger becomes outright book-wrecking. Terrance's characterisation is never deep or complex, but he seems to struggle most with female characters; someone tell him to steer clear and concentrate on his strengths instead.

It's fashionable to laugh at Terrance, but I always kinda liked him. His post-Exodus books are childish and cheerfully dumb, but at least they're usually fun and lively. However in a recent online Head-To-Head competition I conducted, to my surprise people preferred The Time Monster to Endgame (21-17) and The Twin Dilemma to Catastrophea (21-14). The Twin Dilemma?!!? Terrance's work these days is pretty much the embodiment of "trad, trad and more trad, but at least he's good for a laugh." I'd have expected his stuff to be at least skulking in the third division, not going out to TV opposition that might have been hand-picked to be the weakest imaginable.

But on reflection I decided that's probably fair. Most of Terrance's books are inferior to the dregs of the TV series. We love to bash the weaker stories, forgetting that in television terms even the worst Doctor Who is well up on most of what's out there. I'd sooner watch Seasons 23 and 24 than Star Trek: Enterprise, for instance, and it's not even close. Yes, Terrance's novels are basically crap - but they're also bouncy, cheerful and surprisingly enjoyable if you're not looking for literature. He's well ahead of several other Who authors I could name!

It's time to rank his books! Going from worst to best, to date we have...

10th - The Eight Doctors, of course. Most of Terrance's novels are cheerful no-brainers with only minimal differences from all the others, but this is something special. Brain-damaged, scary (in a bad way) and unintentionally hilarious, this is the book that set Doctor Who back thirty years and probably did more damage to the franchise than any other novel. Yes, even War of the Daleks. It's every kind of crap and more besides. I loved it! 2 out of 10.

9th - Warmonger, in which Terrance tries to do an ambitious galaxy-spanning epic and completely fails to live up to the challenge. The tragedy is that a couple of rewrites might have turned this into another Timewyrm: Exodus. It's full of Terrance's trademark jollity, but Warmonger will leave your intelligence bruised and your skin feeling slimy.

8th - Deadly Reunion, which is mostly okay except for the blatant Daemons rip-offs, surprisingly lacklustre 3rd Doctor and Jo, multiple deus ex machina endings and incoherent silliness that passes for a plot.

7th - Blood Harvest. The individual subplots are lots of fun, but they don't mesh. I really wanted more links between Chicago and the vampire planet. Agonal is a prototype Player and the continuity (especially Borusa) is painful even by Terrance standards. Did we need to visit Gallifrey? I think not. 7 out of 10, though I did enjoy it.

6th - Players, though on another day I might almost have placed it second. There's precious little difference between this and, say, Mean Streets, to pick at random. It's undemanding frivolous entertainment, but it deserves a raspberry for writing the second and sixth Doctors (of all people) as Pertwee. 7 out of 10.

5th - Catastrophea. Rereading it gave me a clearer view of its faults, but I still enjoyed it. Slow and daft, but it contains some of Terrance's best intentional comedy and some glorious evocations of the 3rd Doctor and Jo. Another 7 out of 10.

4th - Mean Streets. Perhaps the definitive Terrance novel - daft fun and nothing more, with too much continuity (this time to Shakedown). Does its job perfectly, entertaining you for its duration and not exactly lingering in the mind afterwards. Yet another 7.

3rd - Shakedown, which contains all kinds of un-Terrance-y things... Imagination! Originality! Tension! (Well, during the middle section at least.) It's funny and charming; 8 out of 10.

2nd - Endgame. Terrance doesn't know how lucky he was to get commissioned during the Earth arc. Without its scary Doctor this would lurk somewhere near Players, but as it stands it's an unsettling, effective little piece. 8 out of 10.

1st - Timewyrm: Exodus, again of course. This was Terrance's first full-length novel and he clearly worked hard on it for once. This is his masterpiece, the book where all his quirks and foibles work. The prose is crafted, the Nazis are scary and the alternate future is genuinely unsettling. Even Terrance-haters admit this one's a corker. 10 out of 10.

So there you have it, a trip through the work of Uncle Tewwy. Would I read another Terrance Dicks novel? Well, obviously. I read everything! But despite all my bad experiences with his books - the shallow flimsiness of the prose, cobbled-together plotting, self-indulgent smugness, excessive continuity and rape references... despite all that, I think I'd still look forward to another Terrance Dicks novel. He's fun.


"The TARDIS materialised with its familiar wheezing and groaning sound..." by Joe Ford 20/3/05

The War Games (co-written with Malcolm Hulke)

Robot

The Brain of Morbius

Horror of Fang Rock

State of Decay

The Five Doctors

Timewyrm: Exodus

Blood Harvest

Shakedown

The Eight Doctors

Mean Streets

Catastrophea

Players

Endgame

Warmonger

Sarah Jane Smith: Comeback

Deadly Reunion (co written with Barry Letts)

He has also written a great number of novelisations for the TV stories. These include An Unearthly Child, Planet of Giants, The Dalek Invasion of Earth, The Smugglers, The Faceless Ones, The Abominable Snowmen, The Web of Fear, The Wheel in Space, The Krotons, The Seeds of Death, The Space Pirates, Spearhead From Space (or The Auton Invasion), The Ambassadors of Death, Inferno, Terror of the Autons, The Mind of Evil, The Claws of Axos, Colony in Space (or The Doomsday Weapon), Day of the Daleks, The Mutants, The Time Monster, The Three Doctors, Carnival of Monsters, Planet of the Daleks, The Time Warrior, Death to the Daleks, The Monster of Peladon, Planet of the Spiders, Robot (or The Giant Robot), Genesis of the Daleks, Revenge of the Cybermen, Terror of the Zygons (or The Loch Ness Monster), Planet of Evil, Pyramids of Mars, The Android Invasion, The Brain of Morbius, The Hand of Fear, The Deadly Assassin, The Face of Evil, The Robots of Death, The Talons of Weng-Chiang, Horror of Fang Rock, The Invisible Enemy, Image of the Fendahl, The Sun Makers, Underworld, The Invasion of Time, The Stones of Blood, The Androids of Tara, The Power of Kroll, The Armageddon Factor, Destiny of the Daleks, Nightmare of Eden, The Horns of Nimon, Meglos, State of Decay, The Keeper of Traken, Four to Doomsday, Kinda, Arc of Infinity, Snakedance, The Five Doctors, Warriors of the Deep, Caves of Androzani and The Mysterious Planet.

The War Games sees Terrance breaking into writing Doctor Who and he and Malcolm Hulke write a terrific script, one that bursts with tension, excitement and humour. The second Doctor is given some gorgeous material and gets to emote like never before, stomping around pretending to be the Examiner from the War Office, having to deal with almost being shot, turning on his friends (or pretending to), running from his people and finally proudly admitting to his interference in the affairs of others. The story is bursting with fun characters like Lady Jennifer, Arturo Villa, Carstairs, The War Lord, The War Chief, etc... and the story unfolds with crystal clarity, only stalling in a few of the middle episodes before finishing on one of the best climaxes of any Doctor Who story, the Doctor's punishment at the hands of his own people. Strong dialogue and non-stop fun, this is a superb debut: 9/10

Having script edited the entire Pertwee era Terrance has a firm idea of where the series is come Robot and this is (pretty much) the swansong story of the UNIT era, a story that is (obviously) dealing with the insane new Doctor but also a final hurrah for the gang who we have grown to love and cherish over the past five years. There is something of a cartoonish feel to the whole story, which starts with the script. Terrance knows how to entertain his audience and how better than to write a story mixing heavy ideas like Nazis and nuclear bombs with a Giant Robot developing Fay Ray style crushes. Surprisingly Terrance imbues the Robot with quite a lot of characters and you do sympathise with the creature, its story is far more interesting than all the silly stuff with Hilda Winters and her cronies. Brilliantly the fourth Doctor is written as a total loon with some wonderful lines ("The nose is a definite improvement!"). A mixed bag but hugely entertaining: 8/10

Revealing his eye for strong dialogue right from the off, Horror of Fang Rock sees Terrance Dicks at his best. The story is steeped in atmosphere and terror and the location, plot and characters all contribute to this. For characterisation this could be Terrance's strongest TV story, arrogant Parmendale, shrieking Adelaide, the brooding Doctor, shy Vince, feral Leela... they all leap off the page with excellent lines for all involved. The Rutans are finally revealed and with their shape shifting abilities and electric touch they are far more frightening than their Sontaran enemies. The story has an excellent pace and the conclusion is very logical and well thought out. The scene where the Doctor and the Rutan discuss politics on the stairs of a Victorian Lighthouse is pure genius: 9/10

Under the heavy restraints of JNT's "include everybody!" and having to push harder than Robert Holmes' earlier attempt, Dicks' The Five Doctors suffers from having too many characters and not concentrating enough on any of them. It doesn't help that the poor man had wait to hear who would be available for the shoot so he had to write for certain characters at extremely short notice. As such Sarah Jane, Susan and Tegan are nothing but caricatures of their usual selves and make little impression except as moaners and hapless victims. Even the Doctors suffer. Most Doctor Who fans consider the inclusion of so many characters and monsters from the past a glorious event to be celebrated but there is very little to get your teeth into here and the nostalgia feels far too indulgent (a Dalek and Yeti turning up for no reason). Aside from some information about Rassilon and some cute lines The Five Doctors is just a silly excuse for a party. At least Graeme Williams knew better: 4/10

I must be one of the rare few who don't consider Terrance's first foray into original Doctor Who fiction to be the be all and end all of the New Adventures. Admittedly the story is as tight as you might expect from Terrance and he gets the seventh Doctor and Ace perfect (he should have written for them on the telly). What I object to is the cliched story (the Nazis won the war you know!) and the dredging up of old ideas from his TV scripts (It was those dastardly Warlords behind it all!). There are some nice shocks and McCoy would have had a ball with this material but compared to some of the later, more mature New Adventures this is shallow stuff and written in a style far too similar to the Target books to break from their mould: 6/10

Whereas I am far more forgiving of Blood Harvest even though once again it returns to old ideas he has already used. The gangster half of the story is easily the best with the Doctor, Ace and Dekker proving a surprisingly engaging team and getting into lots of mischief. The characterisation isn't anything special but the book breezes past harmlessly and allows us to catch up with Romana and pull her back into our universe for a multitude of adventures. Some of the more horrific material would be unacceptable if it wasn't for Terrance's expert ability to tone down the gore and crank up the tension (as opposed to having Mick Lewis writing it...): 7/10

Considering Terrance's script for the Shakedown production was a bit ropey anyway, once again using his past work as inspiration, it is odd that he managed to create a novel out of it. He partially succeeds and gives much more information and depth to Steg's mission to hunt down the Rutan and the Doctor's involvement in the whole affair makes watching the video a more interesting experience. However the companions exist only the periphery of the story and once again the story is as shallow as a puddle. Goofy fun: 6/10

By far the weakest story Terrance has ever written and a woeful misstep for the spanking new eighth Doctor range. It is shameful to admit that the work of a man who has given me so much pleasure (oo-er) is the literary equivalent of eating horse dung but this really is bad. Not content on trading on one or two ideas from the past he has the amnesiac eighth Doctor hop back into each Doctor's era during one story or another and have the most bizarre encounters. The first Doctor is a real bastard, the third tries to kill him and his encounter with the sixth makes Trial of a Time Lord even more complicated! What's more new companion Sam Jones is introduced with no character or style and the whole story makes you fear for the upcoming books in the range. The prose is pure porridge, plain and lumpy: 1/10

Proving Terrance is as inconsistent as eighties Doctor Who, his next book Catastrophea is a great improvement and possibly his best book to this point. Not only is it completely original with a plot that builds up problems for the regulars to overcome but it also has an abundance of terrific humour that kept me roaring for hours. It's a pure Doctor Who adventure, one you could read to your younger nieces and nephews but glows with that Target exuberance that Terrance excels at. The third Doctor and Jo are made for Terrance to write for and he gets their chemistry spot on and reminds me why I love that era so much. Plus no sign of UNIT, the Master or reversing the polarity of the neutron flow! Engaging as hell: 8/10

When taking the Eighth Doctor into a new era and giving his character darker shadings it seems odd that editor Justin Richards would turn to Terrance to write the fourth story in the Caught on Earth novel arc. What's more surprising is to find he does a pretty good job of capturing this new Doctor, bored with his life on Earth and not wanting to get involved in the petty affairs of human beings. So of course he's off around the world caught up in the political machinations of several countries and fighting those meddlesome Players again. There are some disturbing references to homosexual behaviour but aside from that this is a harmless, diverting and pacey action adventure: 7/10

I shall not discuss Warmonger such is the list of literary and Doctor Who related crimes the books commits, except to admit that perhaps The Eight Doctors wasn't the worst book he has written. If you want a list of reasons to loathe this book go and read Finn Clark's superb review of the book, he says it all perfectly: 1/10

Deadly Reunion is much more like it! There isn't a single original idea in the book (the Master, UNIT, the alien drugs and the deadly pop concert have all been dealt with in the books before) but the pairing of Terrance and the third Doctor never fails to light up a book. This is just like watching a two part Pertwee story with the usual fun and comic book violence, Jo acting dim, the Doctor patronising the Brig, the Master acting super cool... it is more sugary nostalgia but there is a nice story here too. Character perfect dialogue tops this masterful piece of nostalgia: 8/10

Terrance is the voice of the Target novels and a mighty fine job he did of making a name for himself too. It is true that now, as adults, it is easy to go back and nitpick at his shallow prose style and reliance on the TV scripts' dialogue (as opposed to the later Targets that actually embellished what we saw on the telly and added a lot of depth) but none of this can change just how exciting Terrance manages to make Doctor Who with these novelisations. For youth aged ten and above these books are required reading, Terrance capturing that essential magic about the TV series better than any other writer. My personal favourites are Dalek Invasion of Earth (a story which I loathe in its six part yawnathon TV version but which Terrance somehow makes palatable and what's more hugely atmospheric!) and Day of the Daleks (with its complex storyline it feels a good deal thicker and involved than Terrance's usual output). His weakest are probably Kinda and Snakedance from the Davison years because both these stories require a writer who understands their layers but instead this is smack in the middle of Terrance's barely innovative "straight to the page from the script" stage.

It is hardly any surprise to note that Terrance Dicks the most prolific writer in Doctor Who history or that he is far more suited to script writing than novels (that's original novels, not novelisations). Think of him as an artiste, painting in broad strokes but evoking a strong sense of excitement and colour. Nothing he has ever written has been dull, it might have been utterly fantastic or excruciatingly bad but never, ever boring, I do not think he has the capacity for it. There is always plenty of running around and problems to solve in his work and being so closely associated with the series for so many years his handle on the regulars from any era is pretty good although (of course) his work with third Doctor, Jo and UNIT is astonishingly evocative.

If there were anything I wanted to see from Terrance in the future it would be more originality and less reliance on his past stories. Some might call it laziness and others would suggest he is merely embellishing what he has already written (nobody moans when Lawrence Miles writes four books around Faction Paradox and then keeps going in a spinoff series) but I would like to see more books like Catastrophea and Shakedown, where he has had to put some effort into thinking up his own spanking new story. And with a new Terrance Dicks book due out this year featuring the second Doctor AFTER The War Games... it could be truly wonderful.

Raise a glass to Terrance Dicks, Doctor Who's elder statesman and a wonderful writer to boot.


A Retrospective by John Seavey 14/2/13

It's worth mentioning right at the start that, unlike previous retrospectives, I did not try to read the entirety of Terrance Dicks' published output, or even his published Doctor Who output. "Uncle Terry" has been inextricably linked to the series since before I was born, and his prose stylings practically defined the Doctor for an entire pre-VCR generation. Ask any Doctor Who fan over thirty-five, and their memories of their favorite classic series episode are probably going to be at best half-actual-TV-show, half-novelization. And since Terrance Dicks wrote about a third of the novelizations, the simple math means that Doctor Who as we know it is about 1/6th Terrance Dicks' output by volume. So, for these purposes, I made the cut-off at the start of the Wilderness Years, and read my way through Timewyrm: Exodus, Blood Harvest, Shakedown, The Eight Doctors, Mean Streets, Catastrophea, Players, Endgame, Warmonger, Deadly Reunion, World Game, Made of Steel, and Revenge of the Judoon.

The overall experience was a bit like sitting through the stage show of a magician you remember seeing in childhood, now well past his prime. The robes are a bit threadbare at the sleeves, the collapsible hat creaks dangerously as it expands, and every once in a while one of the tricks goes horribly wrong. But he's got his patter down to a polish so fine that even as you spot the sleight-of-hand, you can't help but be charmed by the act all over again.

The "patter" is a big part of the Terrance Dicks experience. After writing over a hundred books, most of them featuring the same exact character with a change of face here and there, Dicks developed a few turns of phrase that served him well over the course of his Target novelizations. The TARDIS always dematerializes with a wheezing, groaning sound; the Doctor's face is variously "open", "young-old", or "teeth and curls", depending on the incarnation; and the Doctor breezes through situations with a calm, "In an authoritarian society, people tend to obey the voice of authority" or "A path once trodden is never forgotten." It's either brilliantly economical or ferociously lazy, depending on how generous you tend to feel during any given book.

This same ruthless economy of effort extends through to his plots. Terrance Dicks never comes up with anything just to use it once. Looking at the list above, Dicks reuses plot elements from The War Games, State of Decay, Shakedown (once you've written it as a video, why not write it again as a novel?), The Sea Devils, The Daemons, The Five Doctors, Shakedown (again, actually...once you've created some new characters to flesh the script out to novel length, why not reuse them?), Mean Streets (once you've reused your characters, why not reuse the story elements in the new story?) Players (multiple times; if Dicks was going to have to create a new villain, he at least wanted to get some use out of her) and The Brain of Morbius. All of which just happen to have been written or script-edited, by sheerest coincidence, by one Mister Terrance Dicks. (The effect is stronger when one reads the books back to back to back, of course. By the time World Game rolled around, with entire sections quoted word for word from Players, it started to feel like Dicks wasn't so much writing as reprinting.)

Still, the same instinct for economy serves him very well most of the time. Even his most frustratingly lazy works, like Warmonger and The Eight Doctors, are plotted and scripted so concisely that the prose flows with remarkable speed and rapidity. There's never a point where a Terrance Dicks novel feels bogged down or dull; the plot constantly moves from event to event, with no doldrums or unnecessary sequences. Uncle Terry doesn't see the point in writing something that he doesn't absolutely have to in order to move the story along, and while that can sometimes mean that the plots rely on coincidence and the Doctor develops superpowers as needed to get him out of a tight spot (or the right people believe him simply because of his "commanding nature"), it also means that you're never bored reading a Dicks Doctor Who novel. Occasionally flabbergasted, but never bored.

Ultimately, the best of Dicks' original Who is his early and his late work. His first novel, Timewyrm: Exodus, was written for an editor who clearly challenged him to go above and beyond his usual party-pieces. The result is a savagely brilliant, witty indictment of the corrupting nature of power that lingers long after The Eight Doctors has been blessedly forgotten. And his recent Quick Reads books, Made of Steel and Revenge of the Judoon, have deprived him of his usual fallback of reusing his own material. The result is a pair of taut, fast-paced reads that remind you just how much of Doctor Who is, and always will be, the work of Uncle Terry. And just how much we look forward to more.


"Before I say something tactless" by Thomas Cookson 16/3/17

I've decided here to focus on The Five Doctors. It is after all Terrance Dicks' most definitive work. Not quite his best (Horror of Fang Rock), nor his most seminal (The War Games).

But it's perhaps fitting that celebrating 20 years of Doctor Who in one feature special should go to the man who played a huge part in shaping its history, introducing much of the show's lore and beloved characters - the Time Lords, the Master, Sarah Jane - and nurturing Pertwee era writers like Malcolm Hulke and Robert Holmes.

But now the 20th Anniversary spell's worn off, are the more cynical fans right that this story wasn't that good?

Perhaps a backlash was inevitable. The Five Doctors had the misfortune to tent pole the show's 80's continuity obsession, which perhaps in hindsight makes us a bit sick of The Five Doctors' fannish pleasures and renders it far less special.

We've also since learned about Robert Holmes' unmade 20th Anniversary special that got scrapped last minute, which apparently featured a stronger narrative and a story explanation for why Richard Hurndal's Doctor doesn't quite resemble Hartnell.

With fandom largely lauding New Who's modernised emotive sensibilities, if not necessarily their execution, Terrance is more easily dismissed as a has-been (who after Horror of Fang Rock was never that good again). We all know Uncle Terrance is nostalgic for the Dunkirk spirit and likes things stiff-upper-lipped and pat. Whereas RTD allegedly gave Who an emotional beating heart and consciousness, even a rage and fire.

There's much that's jolly and sweet about The Five Doctors, but no one would mistake it for a profound, poignant character drama.

It's also rather derivative of State of Decay and The War Games, so you could treat it as a greatest-hits package or something you could take or leave. In its absence, we'd be only one Ainley Master story short, State of Decay would've been Terrance's arguably stronger swansong, and Pertwee's demise in Planet of the Spiders would be far more final.

However, we'd also never have seen Susan again; Shada and K9 and Company would've gone completely to waste; and 1983 would've been a far more depressing year for Doctor Who. I sometimes think The Five Doctors is the only Davison story that did the show any favours.

Philip Sandifer's unforgiving evisceration of this story has been bothering me. Now, for a critic, snobbery and high standards are a healthy thing. Being unmoved by fanboy hype and seeing the rarer, overlooked jewels beneath. Sandifer has often prompted me to really rethink certain stories.

But his petulant complaints about The Five Doctors honestly read like he was still holding a grudge over childhood disappointments that we only got snippets of Tom and Lalla and the Dalek when he expected them to feature prominently. Despite knowing the reasons why, and why perhaps the story's better for their brevity of appearance, he still seemed to insinuate some malice behind their marginalisation. Basically looking for a reason to bash the endeavour, refuse to go along with its fun, and rant at fans to 'repent sinner!' for loving this uncritically.

Sandifer largely seemed to condemn The Five Doctors for not being overly sentimental or emotional. In short, for not being written by Russell T Davies, as though fandom should be ashamed for enjoying it for what it is and overlooking its missed opportunities for sentimentality. He argued the Yeti sequence should've been excised to accommodate a more emotionally substantial reunion between Pertwee and the Brigadier. Even though we'd already had Mawdryn Undead.

Does Sandifer believe 1983's run of stories should've emotionally repeated themselves to death like RTD does? Bizarrely, but predictably, Sandifer had seemingly no complaints whatsoever about RTD never reuniting the Brigadier with the Doctor at all, or about The End of Time's farewell tour being the definition of authorial ego-stroking.

Apparently, whilst RTD Who has carte blanche to celebrate itself all the time at the expense of coherent plotting, The Five Doctors is somehow unforgivable, or at least deserves thorough chastisement, for the one time it tried doing the same. Perhaps he'd have adored Sarah's line "they leave you out when things get interesting" if Moffat wrote it.

Furthermore, Sandifer's complaint that this rush-written story should've at the eleventh hour found room for Leela is bizarre and grossly hypocritical, given his sanctimonious condemnation of fandom's 'toxic entitlement' for wanting more classic Doctors in the 50th. I'm not sure Leela would make sense here without her own Doctor. Surely the right time to bring her back was in Arc of Infinity, where there actually was room for her and to make that story more special.

Sandifer also complained that Tegan's pairing with the more patrician First Doctor reads uncomfortably as a modern Taming of the Shrew. Now I do think Terrance got the First Doctor wrong, characterising him as the kind of rampaging chauvinist he never was. But Tegan for once is written as a mature, likeable adult. Back in Four to Doomsday when acting like a tantrumous child, she seemed to earn being treated as one.

Here when Tegan volunteers to go with Hurndall's Doctor to the tower, she actually feels like the modern female youth leading the way, and there Terrance absolutely got the spirit of the story right, reinforcing that the show still belongs to the modern incumbents. So I completely reject Sandifer's interpretation there.

If Sandifer can contrive The Doctor, The Widow and The Wardrobe to be somehow a 'feminist' story so he can politically justify liking it (whilst absurdly claiming it's why we older fans hated it), why not for this? Perhaps it's about Sandifer's issues with the Davison era's frustratingly wasted potential. JNT had been asserting a soap sensibility to the show, which I've never cared for, either in 80's or New Who.

As a teen, I watched Eastenders and Brookside, because I was becoming interested in real-life relationships, interpersonal drama and figuring out whose side I was on (usually the man's), and felt that desire in me for the justice of seeing both sides of the story heard.

Putting soap into Doctor Who strikes me as redundant when the question of whose side the viewer's on is either already answered or comes from the story's own moral debates. In City of Death, we wonder if Scarlioni's intentions are so bad or whether the Doctor is right to stop him. Put Jackie Tyler in there, moaning about how unfair it all is on her, it'd do nothing but sour the whole experience. Frankly this story is a relief from the two seasons prior of amateur shrill hysteria.

I firmly believe JNT's production team didn't understand their audience or who the show was for. The show's audience had long been taught by the show to regard its rubber-suited monsters as conscious beings with a point of view of their own, and to judge them not by their appearance but the contents of their character. Warriors of the Deep then presents its Silurians behaving no better than any human Nazis, then dares accuse the humans and, by proxy, the well-versed viewer of being prejudiced against them when their actions have spoken for themselves. Comparatively, this story's actually interested in how the Doctor may solve each predicament, and thus is actually rewarding.

However, Sandifer did argue for Kinda and Mawdryn Undead as where the JNT soap-opera approach really worked for Doctor Who, when handled by writers who honestly get it and can write stories where we understand these characters without condemning them, and we want to see the antagonist and their neuroses 'healed' rather than punished and see the best outcome for all.

So Terrance Dicks returning us to pantomime villainy and stiff upper lips is perhaps jarring. Perhaps it wouldn't be so jarring had Enlightenment been the proper conclusion to the po-faced Davison soap and we hadn't suffered the fly in the ointment of The King's Demons making an unending mess of the era again and thus making The Five Doctors seem messier. Maybe then The Five Doctors would've felt righter in bringing all eras into a confluence of frivolity.

I get why, for Sandifer, old school Terrance was out of step with this modern direction and The Five Doctors as a throwback seems to regress this more interesting soap development. Here these characters exist more for nostalgia than significant emotional interpersonal interaction. Where Davison's Doctor finally sees his granddaughter Susan again after all these years, then virtually ignores her, and where Tegan faces the Master again and still shows barely any emotion over the fact he murdered her aunt.

The story's most emotional scene is where Davison finally discovers Borusa's treachery, and even this seems more down to how the scene's performed, with Davison genuinely wounded by what's happened to his friend and mentor, whilst Borusa carries a glint in his eye of remorse over the Castellan's death but can't back down now. There's also the scene of Jamie and Zoe's phantoms vanishing, which poignantly reminds of all that the Time Lords took from the Doctor.

Beyond that, I can see why a show that ended here might seem screaming out for some kind of emotional rejuvenation. But I also remember as a child there being something intriguing about its heroes displaying more alien, pragmatic ways of emotionally processing or reacting to events or encounters that would be heartbreaking or traumatic for us.

I've long felt wanting to 'fix' The Five Doctors is wanting it to be a different story entirely, and why would you want that? The Five Doctors was cleverly, delicately crafted to be what it is and to draw all viewers onto the same page. And delicate craft was something in short supply in this period.

But maybe now Sandifer's opened that pandora's box, I can't help wondering if The Five Doctors could've or rather should've been better.

Perhaps the theme and moral of the story that informs its chilling conclusion is deeply dubious. Borusa was dangerous and needed putting out of the way for his ambition for immortality, but it was Rassilon's temptation itself that made him dangerous in the first place. Did the Castellan really have to die to prove Rassilon's point? Besides, at this point, it's clear the Master, who also wanted immortality, is more deserving of that eternal punishment.

The Five Doctors is infinitely charming, but for what it could've been, it feels somehow trivial and unimportant, especially compared to Logopolis or even State of Decay.

The first fifteen minutes are genuinely tense and frightening. It essentially begins where The Name of the Doctor ends, with the Doctor mortally wounded by the beginnings of his erasure. It's an audacious start to an anniversary story, threatening to erase the show's history, and utilises Davison's vulnerability perfectly.

Within the Death Zone's mazes and mist, there are Daleks and silent Cybermen waiting to strike at our heroes, grabbing the Brigadier through the walls, like we're experiencing the Doctor's nightmare of every foe out there that hates him.

Unfortunately, it loses all tension when Sarah Jane rolls pathetically down a hill and needs towing up. One can only long for the Auton attack that was originally planned for Pertwee to rescue her from. Then all too quickly Davison stabilizes, and the threat to his existence just becomes forgotten. The mist clears, the overexposed Cybermen dozily plot amongst themselves rather than striking unforeseen. The Master gets further reduced to a safe, pantomime villain. Everything settles, then drags. It had the ingredients to be consistently tense and edgy, but it lacked tightness. And any spirit of fun here is clearly compromised by the miserable weather.

For all this could've been a climactic narrative collapse story (which arguably inspired more daring examples), ultimately it's by Terrance Dicks, so a U-turn for the pat and cozy was never far away.

But then, no one but Terrance could've written this.